Imperfectly Perfect

Jun 23, 2021

Imperfectly perfect.

HUMAN

Bringing life into this world is one of the most amazing things I get to do. I delivered several babies over the past 2 days and I always like to ask what the names are and let Bella know when I get home. I delivered Palmer, Boone, Kamaron, Kalia and a few more. When you think about it it is a miracle these babies come out and are normal. So innocent. So delicate. So much potential. Just insanely amazing when you know all the things that can wrong. I mean let’s face it it is miraculous.

And most all OBs that I know deeply care and feel when things don’t turn out perfect. At times there is no answer as to why but we give our all and our life at the sacrifice of sleep, time with family and for the greater good. Most of us feel so much compassion to our patients when things don’t go right and even cry with them.

I’ve been reflecting a lot about my lawsuit and want people to understand that because of all we give and time we put in it just shakes us to our core when we get served. We feel it’s a personal attack on our abilities and even though logically we know most of the time it’s about money it doesn’t change the thoughts we have. Those intrusional thoughts come at us so unexpected. This is when a trigger of some sort brings you back to the event. We could be at home, in the office seeing patients, playing with our kids, exercising and all of a sudden our thoughts go to our event and bring back all those emotions of anger, shame, doubt, not being enough. I know I talk about my lawsuit but this can happen with any stressor or event that has personally shook you.

This is where I have really been able to transform myself by learning how to change those thoughts over the past year. It doesn’t mean they completely go away but they can be managed. Working with a life coach has been transformational. This is the reason I am on this journey to help other physicians facing what I went through. So much data is now coming in on how life coaching works.

To learn more come chat with me.

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